/bɪ ə gʊd gɜ:l/ n. moniker of she who blogs here [also known as, bie]; adj. personal awesome advice to all female kiddos

meet the fam #thechennies

meet the fam #thechennies



One of my lesser known 'writings' which was previously published on my private tumblr page sometime late last year. Dug it out and decided to share. 
I'm glad to say that Bielet's not a cry-baby though :):) Bielet, my brave baby. *Proud*

My heart breaks every time you cry.

When just a wee month old, when I was still a noob at being a mama (actually still am but slightly better now) and couldn’t decipher if you were crying for milk or diaper change or just a simple hug.
When you were in the back seat all by yourself, your chauffeur (read: me) was stuck in a jam and singing terribly at the top of her lungs to entertain you and you would shriek at the top of your lungs to drown out her awful voice.
When I burped my signature BURP~ just to scare you a little, to see you recoil in shock and have your cute eyes round in alarm, but you got the fright of your life and let out an initial soundless cry that scared the hell out of me, and then the loudest cry I have ever heard - reverberating through my ear drums and multiplying my guilt enough to drown me in it.
When you were just starting to stand on your 2 small feet and balance those wobbly knees, but knocked your tiny head against that wall that should have known better than to be in the way and you were overcome by stars and sobs.
When I was trying to coax you to sleep at night but you preferred playing with your toys and flipping through your books - our first stand-off! - you started showing your displeasure through sighs and fake cries but ballooned into emphatic wails. Mama stood strong and didn’t cave in but inside, I wanted so much to hug you soothe you kiss you.
When you got a big fright waking up alone in the room, thinking we had abandoned you (when we were just being slobs and trying our earnest to enter the couch potato hall of fame) and bawled your little lungs out.
When you got a nightmare, from perhaps your papa making too many faces at you that morning and you awoke from slumber, scrunching up your face with tears streaming down.
When you are tired and just want to cradle in papa’s or mama’s arms but someone else appears and is a little too close for comfort or tries to wrestle you away, your soft cries and death grip on me make me certain that I will protect you from anything with everything I have.

Because you see, mama’s heart breaks every time you cry. It gets better when you smile, but somewhere, mama always remembers what made you cry so I’ll try my best to make sure it never happens again.
Now mama just needs to devise ways to stop those buckets of tears when you grow up and when a pet passes on, when you get a low score on your favourite or hated subject at school, when your bff didn’t really mean forever, when that hunk turns out to be junk.

Don’t cry sweetheart. Mama loves you! xoxo


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